i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
