4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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