we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I can't put those talents on a resume
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize