I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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