Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
