he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
