Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
