i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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