I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
