I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize
