Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
In America we eat man semen.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
