there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Let's get the cat blown out
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
