I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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