FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
