It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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