I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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