is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize