Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize