Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
