Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize