i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
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Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
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I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
God has nothing to do with this.