THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
