I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
