he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.