break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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