I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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