Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
