Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
