Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize