Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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