Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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