Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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