i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
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As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
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I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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