WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
