So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Thank you for not boning my boss.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
