I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
