so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize