Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Randomize
