Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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