worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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