: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
