Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  you'll never guess what i found when i got home...

  (928): View more from Arizona

  a cake, in the toilet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): you'll never guess what i found when i got home... (928): a cake, in the toilet http://tfl.nu/md4l
  Replies (25) Good night (5748) Bad night (1203)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog. http://tfl.nu/8mg1
  Replies (18) Good night (10461) Bad night (2070)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it http://tfl.nu/jk9d
  Replies (18) Good night (9765) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading http://tfl.nu/eqt2
  Replies (8) Good night (2168) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me. http://tfl.nu/uneh
  Replies (14) Good night (1258) Bad night (3324)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes http://tfl.nu/t8pf
  Replies (7) Good night (1151) Bad night (2751)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES. http://tfl.nu/638m
  Replies (15) Good night (2868) Bad night (1141)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible. http://tfl.nu/fwco
  Replies (4) Good night (1000) Bad night (1498)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.

  (512): View more from Texas

  That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur. (512): That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot? http://tfl.nu/yofn
  Replies (10) Good night (2909) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul http://tfl.nu/k128
  Replies (4) Good night (673) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack. http://tfl.nu/afhg
  Replies (2) Good night (446) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE. http://tfl.nu/9lhc
  Replies (7) Good night (2914) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk" http://tfl.nu/jf8r
  Replies (4) Good night (347) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?

  (1-317): View more from Indiana

  All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen? (1-317): All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol http://tfl.nu/15ix
  Replies (1) Good night (918) Bad night (239)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I get a little bitchy. We all know that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I get a little bitchy. We all know that http://tfl.nu/1b6a
  Replies (2) Good night (383) Bad night (164)

Randomize