windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"