fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
