Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
