ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊