Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
