I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
