Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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