now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
