Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
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